Tuesday, November 23, 2010

In memory of...

Today marks the 10th anniversary of my brother's death. Well, one of my brothers. Although, I more often think of Thanksgiving Day as the anniversary. That was when he took his life - early Thanksgiving morning, the year 2000. I was taking care of my 4 month old twins when I got the call.

Just over a year ago, a second brother took his own life, and in much the same way. I was sitting at work when I got the news on that one.

I remember those days so clearly, so painfully. No matter how much time has passed, it's a pain that doesn't lessen. True, some days can go by without me crying. But not a day goes by that they don't cross my mind.

How could two young men take their own lives? And how could the one have done this on Thanksgiving, no less? Of course, in my mind it's his way of smacking people across the face and letting them know they gave him little to be thankful for. Not exactly nice of me to think. But, it's hard to think nice when I know where these boys came from. It truly is amazing to me that the rest of us aren't more messed up than we are.

But anyway, I am rambling now and shall stop. Brandon, I can't believe ten years have passed. I miss you every day. And Matthew, I miss you just as much. You were my little boy. Take care of each other, and watch over your sisters and other brother. You are two very special young men, and I am grateful for every moment I had you in my life. I love you.

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