Friday, September 24, 2010

Dear Me at 17

I have always loved the Brad Paisley song, "Letter to Me." And I have often thought it would be a good topic to write about. But as I sit here, I find it much more difficult than I would have anticipated. Not because I don't know what to say, but because there is just so much to say. Seventeen and eighteen were such a big years for me. By the time my seventeenth birthday came about, I was already nearly two months into my first year of college. And to try to prepare that "me" to what was soon to come? Especially what was to come that next year?

But, I have promised this letter and so here it is...

Dear me at 17...

When you finally get the courage - and trust me, you soon will - to escape the fear and pain you've lived with for ten years, remember those still living in that same home. Do whatever you can to remain close to them. To make sure they know you love them.

Every piece of writing that escapes from your fingers, those hidden between the mattresses, and in your dresser drawers, and jewelry box - keep them safe. They may seem like pathetic whining right now, but they are the memories who make you who I am today.

Stop trying so hard to make someone love you and trust what you want. Trust what you know deep inside. He whose name you write in the sand will be in your heart forever. It doesn't turn out how you want, and although you may try again and again to force it to be that, accept that it is what you need.

No strings attached doesn't exist - but allow yourself to forget that for one special person. Although in the future he doesn't even remember you, you learn more than you can ever realize.

And most of all, and this is a lesson you have yet to follow although you already know it, stop being scared of love. You try so hard (and succeed most of the time) to chase people away because you're afraid. You don't want to be what you grew up with. Stop running. Allow the butterflies to land upon your shoulder.

And one last thing before I end this - remember Halloween. That one day will change your life in ways yet to be understood.

I could come up with more, but this will have to do for now. Enjoy 17 because 18 comes hard and fast.


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